Friday, November 12, 2010

Irrational Fears

Everybody has their likes and dislikes of different foods, but my dislikes are a little bit weird. I have a few weird hates for foods, and a few popular ones. A vegetable that I have found at least a bunch of people hating on is onions.
    Onions are foul tasting ringed slices of bitterness. Their pungent smell reeks in your mouth after consuming them. It emits such a strong odor that it makes people cry. They absorb the genuine flavors of other foods in the dish and replace them with the onion's sour and bitter taste. They have a horrible crunchy texture followed by astringently rancid juices squirting out. Whenever I accidentally bite on one that is inside my food, my whole body freezes with disgust and I feel an urge to puke. I have always been told by my mother that I wouldn't even taste the onions, but now that I think about it, why use the onions in the first place if they are tasteless. When cooked, the onions look like thick strands of hard noodles that haven't been boiled enough, or like long mealworms or maggots that have been rotting in your dish so long, they have stopped wriggling. They have a dreadful taste, texture, stench, and appearance, so I don’t really know why people would eat them.
    I have one really weird food that I would try to avoid biting into, an apple. I really like the taste of apples, but I have a problem with them. Hearing people bite into juicy and crunchy apples is like listening to someone scrape their fingernails on a chalk board for half an hour, but compressed in a minute. I am not sure what is causing me for this to happen, but it has been happening ever since I was little. I would shiver, curl up in a ball, make scrunched up faces, and turn extremely paranoid. I could withstand it for some time, but when it is prolonged, I would turn crazy. Now, even if I think of apples and their sounds, I would shiver and turn cold. I could hear an apple bite from across the room, and start getting goosebumps. This irrational fear of apples has destroyed a great fruit in my life, but I have found replacements for them, like pears.
    I know that the people that read this might go to buy and eat an apple just for me, but I guess I will just try to live through it. I don’t want to feel like the only person with weird and irrational fears of things, so respond to this and tell me what you are afraid of.

1 comment:

  1. I love this post. I cannot respond to your question about what I fear, because I can't think of too many foods that fit this bill at the moment.

    But what your post DID make me think of is a vegetable or two which I USED to fear, but have since grown to love. (Asparagus, artichokes...others? I'd have to think...) Try onions again after five or ten years and maybe you'll feel differently.

    Meanwhile, your loathsome descriptions of them are creative, funny, and fabulous.

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